Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

I am, by nature, a worrier. Maybe it’s because I’m a perfectionist. Maybe it’s because I’m slightly obsessive-compulsive. Maybe it’s because I’m the eldest sibling. There are all kinds of reasons why I worry, but the truth is, none of them justify it. 

What Do You Do?

"What do you do?" It sounds like an innocent question, but it is extremely important, especially for those of us just beginning our journeys as freelancers or independent business owners. The answer to that question determines our personal vision and establishes what steps we will take to reach our goals, such as becoming a full-time independent business owner. If you haven't considered your answer to the question, now is the time to do it before you start on a path that may or may not lead to where you want to go. Seth Godin provides some questions to help you, and me, find the answer to the question. "What do you do?"

Winning the Race

I’m sure that most of us are familiar with Aesop’s fable about the tortoise and the hare, but it never hurts to refresh our memories. The hare proudly asserts that he is the fastest animal and can beat anyone. The tortoise’s response is revealing; he quietly responds that he will challenge the hare. The hare sprints from the starting line, and, once he has a seemingly insurmountable lead, he lies down for a nap. During his nap, the tortoise passes him and crosses the finish line first. When the hare arrives a moment later, the tortoise gently explains that slow and steady wins the race.

Nothing to do in El Paso?

I once was a member of the "there's nothing to do in El Paso" crew. During the past year, I have discovered how mistaken I was. There is plenty to do in El Paso; this past weekend, I attended several events.

Five Steps for Success

I've become a follower of Seth's Blog because Seth typically has invaluable advice for people in the marketing and business world. One of his recent posts, "Simple Five Step Plan for just about Everyone and Everything," was particularly good. In fact, it was so good that I decided to share his plan with you.

Business Ethics - Discretion

As an independent business owner, ethics are extremely important to me. Their importance is one of the reasons I joined the Southwest Character Council. Other reasons include accountability and the opportunity to network with like-minded individuals. One, final reason is the monthly character spotlight; every month, the Council examines a particular characteristic in detail.

This month, the characteristic is discretion. According to Webster, discretion is "the quality of being discreet." That definition is a little lackluster, unless you know the meaning of "discreet." The word "discreet" is an adjective and refers to someone who shows "good judgment in conduct and especially in speech." Ah, now we're getting somewhere.

The Southwest Character Council also focuses on the importance of being discreet in one's speech; they state that discretion "is recognizing and avoiding words, actions, and attitudes that could result in undesirable consequences." The opposite of discretion is recklessness, a lack of self-control and a refusal to guard one's tongue. The inevitable result of recklessness is obvious; we all have heard Vice-President Biden's "foot-in-the-mouth" news clips. That example is somewhat humorous, but I am sure we all have experienced times when we should have controlled our tongues better. What were the results of losing control? In some instances, it has hurt a family member. In others, it has meant the loss of reputation or, possibly, work.

Love is a Verb: Love and Marriage

Society often tells us that in order to “feel” love toward our spouses, we need to love ourselves more. In contrast, the Bible never tells us to love ourselves. It tells us to love God first, then our neighbors (Matthew 22:37-9). According to the Bible, we are to shift our focus from ourselves and onto acting in love toward God and other people.

Putting others before ourselves is difficult, but we have to remember that, according to the Bible, love is a purposeful commitment to sacrificial action for another. God provides the ultimate example of loving, faithful commitment; John 3:16 tells us that God loved us so much that He sent His only Son to die for us. If we are to follow God’s example of love, we must love our spouses even when they act unbecomingly. Loving our spouses even when we do not “feel” like loving them is not hypocritical; rather, it is a demonstration of our commitment to our spouses and of our love for God.

In contrast, faithlessness, which is often the result of a self-focus, causes a multitude of problems. A self-focus tells us to find someone more compatible. It seeks reasons to leave a marriage, and it often allows feelings to dictate actions. Jesus speaks of this self-focus when the Pharisees, a religious sect, asked Him why Moses allowed the Israelites to divorce their wives. Jesus’ reply is revealing. He says, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses permitted you to divorce your wives” (Matthew 19:8). A self-focus is a malignancy in a marriage; if not dealt with quickly and radically, it will kill the relationship.